7.If you had gotten pregnant that first month you started trying, how would you have been a different parent? What changes have you made to your parenting style (either current or future) in the time you spent trying to conceive?
I don't know that my style per se would be different, so much as my view of blessings. I think I would have loved him just as much, but maybe not appreciated the miracle that pregnancy is, even for fertile folk.
Any thoughts I had of what I wouldn't do or idealized about certain things went out the window in the first week. Sometimes I feel like I am drowning in all of it. I hadn't had a style decided, so much as things I DIDN'T want to do. And those things will not change.
But I think perhaps I would have tried harder to get him to sleep on his own. I have no idea if cloth diapering would have occurred to me had I not had so long to think about so many things. I might have valued my own needs from time to time, taking more of a break. But being separated from him is almost impossible. I may not have been that way.
These are things we will never know. Because they are part of the big WHAT IF? that infertility brings us. And so I treat each day with him as a blessing. I treasure every smile, each coo, the weight of him on me sleeping...
He is my miracle.