Friday, July 8, 2011

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge: Day 7

7.If you had gotten pregnant that first month you started trying, how would you have been a different parent? What changes have you made to your parenting style (either current or future) in the time you spent trying to conceive?

I don't know that my style per se would be different, so much as my view of blessings.  I think I would have loved him just as much, but maybe not appreciated the miracle that pregnancy is, even for fertile folk.  

Any thoughts I had of what I wouldn't do or idealized about certain things went out the window in the first week.  Sometimes I feel like I am drowning in all of it.  I hadn't had a style decided, so much as things I DIDN'T want to do.  And those things will not change.  

But I think perhaps I would have tried harder to get him to sleep on his own.  I have no idea if cloth diapering would have occurred to me had I not had so long to think about so many things.   I might have valued my own needs from time to time, taking more of a break.  But being separated from him is almost impossible.  I may not have been that way.


These are things we will never know.  Because they are part of the big WHAT IF? that infertility brings us.  And so I treat each day with him as a blessing.  I treasure every smile, each coo, the weight of him on me sleeping...

He is my miracle.  

1 comment:

Whip me, beat me, take away my charge card. Or just leave a comment. Whichever works best for you :)