Saturday, June 7, 2014

The Unglamorous Side Of Motherhood

2 nights ago Finn threw up in the middle of the night. I rolled in it, it was all over the pillows and bedding. The mattress still smells like it. We cleaned up as best we could and slept elsewhere. Over the last couple of days he's had diarrhea. leading to explosive diapers and poopy EVERYTHING, including me. We have a potty training 3yo. Let's just say bodily functions and fluids have been running my life more so than usual.

Last night, in the span of an hour, I cleaned up diarrhea, then got vomited on, got Finn and I into the bath to wash up where Phelan joined us. After we got out, Phelan pooped in the bath (we are having trouble with that aspect of potty training), and then he got distracted and peed on the side of the couch/floor. We are getting our money's worth out of the spot cleaner we bought. Hubby now has it's process down pat.

Just when I thought we were through the horror, first thing this morning there was more explosive poop and an outfit change for 2 of us.

The good news is that I'm laughing about it. Because crying just seems like overkill.

Also, I don't have the energy to cry. I'm too busy cleaning vomity poopy peed on clothes and bedding.

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Potty Training Hilarity

Being at school is a world of good for Phelan, even if he is having a tough time adjusting. He's in the potty training classroom. Younger kids, but an easier transition for him plus the benefit of potty training. On Tuesday he pottied once successfully; same with Wednesday. Twice on Thursday, and then all day on Friday, excluding nap time.

We hadn't been able to get him to go at home, but it was only an hour before bed. But we sat him on the toilet and tried. He prefers to sit. One night he's on the toilet and we're with him in the bathroom and he's grunting with the effort of trying to produce pee. Then he says, "Mommy, it won't come out. It's broken. I can't fix it!" We about died laughing. He's all pulling at his penis trying to make the pee come out. Hysterical.

This weekend I was determined that we would not lose the progress we made during the week, so I took the diaper off and promised cookies in exchange for successful pottying. I had to go out and get more cookies. So yay! He hadn't pooped all day, which isn't surprising. They hold it for diaper time. But he didn't.

You know those bleachable moments commercials? Well, we had one. Phelan pooped, but not in the potty. He brought Hubby poop. On a lid from one of the pieces of his play kitchen set. "Here, Daddy."  He was so proud of himself. I nearly peed myself laughing. Poop on a platter. I can't wait to tell his first date that story.  BLACK. MAIL.

I had to share.

Saturday, May 24, 2014

What a Week

Monday our sitter gave us a week's notice. One week. You have to understand that we were paying DIRT CHEAP for child care. And we are still really tight on money. So losing her was a panic-inducing blow. To say we were scrambling was an understatment. Assuming we could find a similar situation, most people don't deal with our late pick up (7pm some days), and no childcare facility will. We were on the waitlist for subsidized childcare through the state, but no idea when that would come through.

I was talking to my one boss, with whom I have become friends, and she was so upset at me maybe needing to quit to work for a facility where I can bring the kids for free. Though she understood. We were trying every avenue we could think of.

It turns out that Tuesday night after our meeting my friend went to the director and area director and said to them that they couldn't afford to lose me and they needed to figure something out. They went to the owner.

The next day I found out that they worked out a way for both kids to come to work with me and attend the school without much more cost to me than we had been paying, and it's for 5 days a week, not 3. I cried. My director told me I'm worth it and that they cherish me as a teacher. I cried again.

I've found a community at this job. I feel wanted at this job. And now my kids get to be social. Phelan needs it especially. He's going to have a harder transition than Finn, though Finn had a rough day yesterday.

So that worry was over but then I was worrying about them being in school what with eating issues and Phelan's issues with structure when he's always just free played. Can't win for losing, right?

We've decided to put Phelan in the class just below him, the older 2yo, because it's slightly less structured and has more potty training abilities, to help him transition into going to school. After summer he will move up to the preschool class.

Finn is going into the Toddler class. Young Toddlers, though really it's just one class right now. He is the youngest, and not walking yet. So I think he was overwhelmed  by the rough and tumble of the other kids. But he'll get there. In Older Infants he was king of the roost and had a blast. But he might as well get used to being in a toddler classroom as he'll be walking soon.

I've been given a great opportunity here. To be able to put my kids into a school that they never would have been able to attend. And I can check in on them during the day. I sneak, though, because they still melt down if they see me and then I leave again.

So, a new chapter in our lives. My kids are in school!

Sunday, May 18, 2014


Sorry for that last negative post. I was so frustrated. Am frustrated. It just feels like we never get ahead and it gets old. And exhausting. I was whining, though. I wouldn't want to read outright whining. So I apologize.

Saturday, May 17, 2014


This week I had a whopping $50 to buy groceries. $50. 4 people. Do the math.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Anxiety Full Speed Ahead

Sunday I had a panic attack that had me calling Hubby at work and begging him to come home. Usually if it's a little anxiety I can handle it. This was full blown. I ended up having the neighbor come over and he watched the kids until Hubby could come home. I was a disaster. Monday morning I woke up feeling very discombobulated. I managed to make it to work, but I was seeing double, and kept bumping into the curb driving. My boss sent me home, with a promise to tell her I made it safely. I went to the doctor, and he came close to ordering a CT but opted for bloodwork instead. Now I'm waiting to hear back on it. And I'm off work again. 2 days. I'm still super edgy and at the same time all I want to do is lie in bed. I just saw the psychiatrist a few weeks ago and we kept my meds where they were. I'm wondering if it's time for a change. I'm missing blocks of time from Sunday and yesterday. Like blank spots in the day that I just can't remember. I tried to do laundry that I'd already done. It scared the shit out of me.

Maybe I should switch to decaf.

Sunday, May 4, 2014

Happy Birthday Finn!!!

A year ago today Phelan flopped on my large pregnant belly, tore the placenta, and less than 12 hours later Finn was here. We survived 12 days in the NICU, and Finn has been getting beat up by his brother for a year now. And I'm still breastfeeding. In 2 days I will have been breastfeeding for a year!!!  Woohoo!  And let me tell you, he shows no signs of stopping any time soon.

Finn is a happy, daredevil child. Laid back. We are so lucky. I love this child.  He is starting to stand independently, will be on whole milk starting tomorrow, and we are working on transitioning to sippy cups.  We're also working on him feeding himself more table foods. He seems to be having texture issues. I think. Or he's lazy, LOL. He's about 20lbs, don't know how tall. I will know that tomorrow at his 1 year well check. He doesn't sleep through the night, but neither does his big brother, so this is nothing new in our world. Mama has adjusted.

Happy Birthday, Finnegan!!!