Example: Last night I cuddled him to sleep and he was OUT COLD. As in waited 15 minutes before moving him. Got him on his side. Immediate fussing and he rolled/scooched over to me, and promptly passed out cold for 4 hours. When I get out of bed in the morning, he gradually rolls toward Hubby so that he is close to him. He craves other people's body warmth and comfort.
What this leads to is...well, not a lot of sleep. Saw this:
This thing costs $200-300! Bet I could make one for considerably less.
Of course, there is always this cosleeper that puts the baby in the bed with you, but in a Queen bed, it is fairly bulky. And I don't know if he will do well in that.
It sounds like I'm giving up, doesn't it? When Hubby came to bed last night and I pointed out that he just WON'T stay in his crib (and I can't forgo sleep, I just can't, to get him to), he said "He will do it when he is ready." That to me sounds like acceptance of cosleeping.
I think we need a bigger bed.
We are soooo glad that we have a king sized bed. I know P is a little young yet, but when he's ready, and to avoid the Stalker, Jazz Hands, H is for Hell, etc. positions, we put a crib rail on my side of the bed. Now, when Petite has a particularly bad night in her room, we bring her into bed with us and I end up in the middle. We all get sleep that way! Thank heavens. Hang in there sweetie. I keep reminding myself that no matter how hard things are, it won't last. And there will come a day when I WISH she would cry out for Mommy and want to climb into our bed. Many hugs to you all. Kiss P for us please!
ReplyDeleteI have the crib by our bed but not side car. The rail is up and there's probably 4-5 inches between the crib and our bed. I'll either nurse him to sleep in our bed or nurse him and then let him fuss it out for a minute until he falls asleep either in our bed or the crib. I've made it a point to put him back in the crib consistently and I can usually get him to sleep in the crib at least 6 hours.
ReplyDeleteHe actually only ends up in bed with us now because I fall asleep during the 2am nursing session. Hubby would have him in bed with us every night but I need my sleep and want to sprawl out once in awhile now!
It took us awhile to get to this point but I'm pretty consistent about returning him to the crib and it has helped. He even naps in a playpen at daycare now!
Good luck!
We coslept and our moving them into their own beds went simply (but did take time). My suggestion. Get rid of the crib. Put a twin mattress on the floor. You can bolster the edges (like in the image above) if you want, and pull it from the wall if the concern is that P might trap himself between the wall and bed. It's not a far fall if they do fall (since there are no boxsprings, bedframes, etc- just a mat on the floor). You can lay with him, and slowly roll off. You can keep your hand on his back until he is asleep. Trust me, when your kid loves to cosleep, it will take time for him to get the idea of sleeping alone. But it does happen. I remember that eventually I was just sitting next to the bed... Then next to the door... And now we are at the stage where we put them in bed and walk away.
ReplyDeleteI Feel you! We have a bassinet next to our bed that she may sleep in for 25% of the night maybe 3 nights a week - the rest is in bed with us. I dont mind it - i slept with my parents til kindergarten and I'm normal! (well kinda :)). We have just made our bed as safe as possible. And don't buy that cosleeper thing for the middle of the bed, it's a joke!!!!
ReplyDeleteYeah I'm worried about sleep deprivation as I return to work - and I'm with you - sleep is too important. I say whatever works and it will all work itself out in the end. I think sleep training is made up by psychotic super moms to make the rest of us feel bad. One of them had the gall to ask me when she was 3 weeks old whether my baby was sleeping through the night yet! Wtf??? An infant needs to eat too often for that! Really pissed me off.
Xoxo
They may have simply meant something different by STTN than what the words actually mean. This is something I discovered only recently, when I saw a number of posts from proud mothers saying things like "LO is STTN! She only wakes up twice to eat!"
DeleteUm, if the baby is waking up to eat, then she's not sleeping through the night...
I'm so there with you and laughed out loud at the cartoon. Need. King size bed. Now!
ReplyDeleteNo good advise from me, since we are following you on the exact same path. LOL
ReplyDeleteOh man, we went through this with Cole and Bella. And it was a very hard habit to break. And to be honest they still leave their bed at night and want to sleep with us.
ReplyDeleteWith Garrett and Landon, I ended up moving their pack-n-play right next to our bed so they would have the comfort of knowing I was right there but they weren't actually in our bed. Worked much better.
So obviously, I have no good advice. Just gotta find what works best for you and your family. That pic above of the various co-sleeping arrangements cracked me up!