Monday, June 25, 2012

The Lovey

Lovey: transitional object to aid the feeling of security, to help with self-soothing.

For 14 MONTHS I tried to introduce loveys.  Desperately.  Pacifier: rejected.  Items designed to be loveys: rejected. Blankets, stuffed animals: all rejected.  At some point I just decided self-soothing would never happen.

And then...

About a month ago, one of the nights P was in bed with us because he was having a rough night, he discovered his Lovey.  An item he had contact with for a year because of co-sleeping.  But something clicked that night, and the next morning without us noticing he tossed it off the bed.  It wasn't long before we realized that it was always near him.  Always.

Tired?  Crawl to Lovey and curl up with it.  Upset:  Bury face in Lovey, and sometimes, curl up with it.  Bedtime?  Lovey goes to bed, too.  Time to get up?  Lovey starts the day, too.

I had a difficult time, as with other things regarding babies, believing the magic of the Lovey.  I was the Lovey.  I have been replaced.  By a ratty old handmade pillow with a Teddy Bear in a Santa outfit.  Really?  Okay, whatever works.

Case in point.  Very tired sick baby today - screaming for an hour straight, but didn't want cuddles. I was useless.  And Lovey was in the washer.  And fell apart...again.  It had to be repaired.  So there I was, trying to sew (not very well, I might add.  He doesn't care if it looks good!) the pillow back together and he's standing in front of me TUGGING on it, trying desperately to wrest it from my grasp.  The pillow is WET, mind you.  So I finished sewing it, let him grab it, and within minutes he was quiet, and asleep on the floor with it.  On a wet, ratty, old pillow.  Yeah.

The Lovey is magic.  The Lovey is old.  The Lovey is going to need patches (on a pillow!!) before too long.  But dear god, don't get between P and Lovey.  Hell no.

Loving the Lovey.

Can't even let go to drink milk!


  1. LOL... there's no accounting for taste, eh? It could be worse. He could have grown attached to one of your bras or something. :)

    Ginny's first lovey (a stuffed dog, named Stanley) appears to have fallen into the realm of unloved toys recently. I'm kind of wondering if she will 'rediscover' him or if she will bestow her affections on some other object. She's fickle that way.

  2. LOL!!! Nick was just saying last night it's always the things we want them to love that they don't and the things we'd least expect that they do! Ian hasn't attached to a lovey yet either...who knows maybe it will happen yet for us too!

  3. Oh yeah, fantastic!

    I am wondering what Figzy would take to be her lovey...


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