Well, I can't think of a better way to celebrate my 1 year Blogoversary, as well as my 300th post (hey, I am counting Kir's posts - thank you thank you thank you Kir) than with my son's (!!!) Birth Story.
As you know, I was released from bedrest on Tuesday March 15. I promptly nested like a mad woman, and made plans for my pregnancy massage, our taxes, and to finish the house this week. Other than being tired and a bit on the weak side, I was feeling great! Because I could finally prepare for Cricket's arrival. I even went out Friday to a friend's birthday party for her daughter. Saturday I was worn out though from the week, and rested. I hadn't been having contractions, and had decided Cricket was going to surprise us all and make me wait 5 more weeks. Turns out I had been having contractions, but after 2 months, I didn't notice them anymore!
Sunday morning I was dozing, ignoring the cat scratching at the door. I managed to ignore it and continued drifting in and out of sleep...until I felt warm liquid come out of me. I thought, "Great, I peed myself." Went to the bathroom, and dribbled out a little more pee, confirming my thought that I had peed, because it was a small pee. I even posted on FB: "
We were in triage for nearly 3 hours - we verified that I had ruptured and a resident came and did an internal. Quite happily, I found I was 3-4 cm dilated and 80% effaced. Like I said, I simply got so used to the contractions that I didn't feel them. I still wasn't contracting regularly, but hey! I was already in Stage 2! Totally exciting! I was rarin' to go. I asked when we would have a room so I could get up and move around to really get things moving. Because they had been so busy, they were simply waiting for a room to be cleaned, and by 1 we were settled in.
We walked the halls for about half an hour, and I started having contractions, but the second I stopped moving, so did they. My OB decided since I was preterm to start a pitocin drip to try and move things along faster so that he wasn't affected by the lack of fluid. Boooo, but no choice. Thus ended my hall wandering and that's when I had to start letting go of my birth plan.
Pitocin drip began at 2, and again, began contracting, and I sent Hubby for a walk. Right after that, Cricket's heartbeat took a serious dip. Next thing I know, the room is full of nurses, an oxygen mask is on me, and I am being tossed from side to side to find the hb. Hubby walked in on the chaos. I wasn't nervous yet, though. We pulled the Pitocin and waited for Cricket to recover. No change in dilation yet.
We waited 2 hours. We had music going, me chowing on jello, a regular party...with NOTHING HAPPENING. At around 5 maybe? we started the Pitocin again, and this time, we made it quite a bit further. The epidural guy kept checking in to see if I wanted one, but I was determined. I was having contractions about 80 seconds long, maybe 20 seconds of a break in between and feeling them pretty good. Once again, I sent Hubby for a snack...wanted him to get out while he could. Poor guy....came back and what does he find? Me being tossed from side to side, oxygen on, and this time, sobbing. Cricket's hb dropped again. So, the OB checks me....now I'm pushing 5 cm...but that's not a large change in nearly 12 hours. At this point discussion of a possible c-section began, but I was determined to stay positive. But now I was scared. Which made the internal check horrid and I totally screamed - OUCH! OB's should have to have tiny hands.
Around this time my sister showed up with caffeine and motrin for Hubby - gotta love Littlest, LOL. I decided to have the epidural for 2 reasons. First, it was looking to be a loooooonnnnnng night, and I didn't think my energy would last with no rest. Second, if we had to do a c-section, one step was out of the way. I pulled out all my piercings as well.
They also decided to put in an IUPC (intrauterine pressure catheter) to measure my contractions from the inside to see what the hell was going on. Of course, it took a couple tries to get it up there. Why would it be easy? But that's okay, we got it done.
Now, not surprisingly, the epidural didn't go so well, either. Seriously, why would it? It took at least twice the normal time to get in - turns out my vertebrae are rotated and he couldn't find the space for the thingy. Poor Hubby had to leave the room - he wanted to punch this guy for hurting me, LOL. But as usual, we did get it done and 10 minutes later I was giggling about the weirdness of it. Look! There's my legs! But I can't feel them! I also couldn't feel contractions AT ALL. Weird to see stuff on the monitor but not know it's going on.
So, 10 pm, one last shot at the Pitocin. Made it half an hour again. Hubby had stepped out, so you KNOW what happened. Yup. Comes back in to chaos and wifey tossing again. The OB looks at me and says, "You know what this means, right?" Yeah...fuck. C-section. Shit, they called the OR faster than I thought possible. I made a couple quick calls to family, and he called his. Baby coming NOW! That was at just after 10:30.
At 10:50 we were in the OR and I was finally calm. I had looked at the epidural guy when the decision was made and told him he'd better give me a sedative - I was a wreck at this point. So he did. Oh, I love the epidural guy. I'm hollering, "Don't forget to let my husband in! Where is he????" As soon as he was gowned up, he came in and sat by me, and the fun began. Why do they have to put your arms out like that? I think I mentioned something along the lines of having a Jesus on the cross thing going on - soooo bad of me. But really? That's what I felt like! I felt the weirdest sensation as they shaved me, and then saw the bottle of that orange stuff come out, and I knew the show was on the road.
Very soon I felt the tugging and pulling I have heard so much about, and now I'm hollering at Hubby, "You have to watch! I can't, so you have to! This is our kid being born!!!" He refused...a little too freaky for him, LOL.
And then there was a cry.
And Hubby was GONE. They whisked away my kid before I even saw to make sure he was okay. Except, no one told me he was a he. Or a she. They're busy putting me back together, and Hubby's with him, and I finally said, "Ummm, excuse me, could you tell me WHAT I HAD???" Somewhere behind me I hear "boy" and I thought they had to be talking about something else. I said, "I don't have boys. Can you double check?" Cue laughter. Hubby pokes his head around and says, "It's a boy, I win." SHOCK. Okay, okay, it's a boy...I can change my pronouns. Wait, is he okay? "Does he have all his bits??? Is he okay???" Answer being yes, I immediately started sobbing...relief? I don't know. "Are you sure, are you sure?" "Yes, honey, he's perfect." "When can I see him???? Why isn't anyone showing me my kid??"
Once he was finished with his intial eval and clean up, Hubby brought him over so I could see and so we could get pics. I think I just stared - really? This little tiny being just came out of me? This is the creature who has been kicking me for months? SHOCK. Hubby is all grins and "I have a son!" And I am just ... relieved. So much for instant bonding, LOL. I blame the drugs.
There is a blank spot here for about an hour. Next thing I remember is looking around me and saying,
"Where are we?" Oh! Recovery! Wait, it's what time? Did we call the parents? We have to call the parents. Where's my kid? Turns out he had to go for a fuller eval and bath and whatnot, so we called the parents. Me: "Mom..." Mom: "Are you okay????" Me: "You have a grandson." Mom: "She's here! Wait...did you say grandson? Are you sure?" LMAO. "Hold on, I have to tell Lil Sis. It's a boy." Lil Sis: "Are you sure?" Mom: "That's what I said and she said." LMAO. (Suffice it to say it took us all days to totally get the pronouns right...and that's with a concerted effort...my brain still says "she".) Next conversation went like this: Me: "You have a grandson." Dad: "I have a grandson!!!!!" He didn't ask for verification, LOL. We gave the stats, and I believe Hubby called his family.
Where is my kid????? I lose another hour here...2 am arrives, and FINALLY, they bring me my son. (Twitch...it's still weird to say that. I have a SON, I have a SON.)
And he is tiny and perfect. And mine. And ummm, whoa, this kid came from me. Yeah, it took a while to settle in, LOL. I held him, skin to skin, had my first lesson in breastfeeding, and laid him on my chest. And argued when they took him away from me. Apparently they can't leave a baby in the room overnight with someone heavily medicated and unable to move their legs. LOL. But they assured me they would bring him any time I asked. Oh, but I didn't want to let him go. Weird shock feelings aside, all I wanted to do was hold him, look at him, learn him, so that I COULD get over the shock. Holy shit, we had a baby.
We got moved to a postpartum room, and I kicked Hubby out once he got me settled to go get some sleep. And I laid there and tried to grasp the day...
And so, on the day of the Super Moon and Vernal Equinox, my little Earth baby came to stay...
And then there were 3.