He SHOULD be sleeping through the night by now.
He SHOULD be on a schedule by now.
You SHOULD not co-sleep.
Get the idea?
Guess what...EAT ME. This ass-vice comes from everyone from doctors to well-meaning friends. My neurologist even chimed in on the sleeping through the night thing. I said, "Tell him that."
What is it with "Western" cultures and this need for baby structure? Have you seen the research? Babies for the most part end up at the same developmental milestones within the same general amount of time regardless of scheduling, how much belly time you give them, whether they sleep with their parents, or spend the first 6 months of their lives swaddled and carried in a papoose.
Left to his/her own devices, a baby will eventually develop his own schedule.
Am I going to deny my child food because it isn't time for him to eat? NO. If he cries at night, am I going to let him cry it out? NO. Maybe this works for others. But not for me, and not for him.
I can't spoil him. Not possible. And is it so bad that he learns that if he is upset that Mama will come
But I am NOT forcing the issue. I take my cues from him. I knew when I had a child that he would be in charge for quite some time. He is NEEDS based. We are slaves to society, schedules, etc. This is why we want them to be. Because it's hard as hell on us otherwise. Well, guess what? No one said it would be easy.
So, please, stop telling my what I or my baby SHOULD be doing. We'll get there. When he is ready.
SHOULD isn't in his vocabulary. NEED is. So is LOVE.