Thursday, June 27, 2013

Toddler Sleep Avoidance 101

The techniques for avoiding sleep have been passed down through generations of toddlers by a secret network known only to toddlers.  This is a summary of those techniques.


  • Cry, scream, hit, bite, scratch.  Aim for sensitive parts.
  • Get off bed and run away.
  • Jump up and down on bed.
  • Start a pillow fight.
  • Ask for a blanket.  Spend at least 10 minutes arranging it just so.  Decide you are uncomfortable.  Move.  Start over.
  • Ask for more milk/juice/food.
  • Ask for your favorite toys.  
  • Pretend to fall asleep.  When the adult turns their back, sneak out and hide.  Full length window curtains work really well for this.  When caught, laugh and force adult to carry you.  Flail wildly.
  • Pretend to fall asleep.  Sneak out and into someone else's room.  See above for when caught.
  • Sing your favorite song over and over.
Feel free to add your own techniques.  

Note:  not all techniques need to be employed on any given night.  Mix and match for best adult patience-rattling results.  Repeat as necessary.  

And remember, NEVER ADMIT THAT YOU ARE TIRED. 

DOWN WITH BEDTIME!!!!